Martin and Helen Mursu celebrate 75th anniversary

By Tucker Henderson

Editor

One unique milestone that not many couples have reached, was recently surpassed by a lifelong couple, who were born, lived and certainly hope to die here in the New York Mills area. Just over 75 years ago, in a quiet and unassuming ceremony set in the living room of her parent’s home, Helen Tumberg married Martin Mursu.  ¶  The date was March 25, 1950, with an evening wedding at home, Martin and Helen were expecting a small ceremony without much fanfare. Although Helen’s mother invited as many people as could fit in the door, the wedding remained a fairly-small, family affair. Martin’s father, Walter Mursu, who was the lay minister at the Apostolic Lutheran Church at the time, married the couple in the Finnish language. 

  “He officiated our wedding,” said Helen. “He didn’t like to talk English that much, so he had it in the Finnish language. All we had to say was one word, ‘tahdon,’ which is the same as ‘I do.’ My mom had gone overboard and that living room was full of people. She must have been excited because her first child was getting married.”

“Church weddings were not the common thing then,” said Martin.

“Yeah, they were very rare,” agreed Helen. 

The couple explained that most couples would go to the Walter Mursu home to be married and would have their ceremony there. Martin’s older brother, John Mursu, now 97, rural NY Mills, was his best man.

“Most of that history is kind of hidden,” said Martin. “We’ve forgotten about it. It’s crazy how that memory works, you can remember incidents of a deal from way back in time, 80 years ago or more, but you don’t get the whole picture, just a smidgen.”

Martin was born in 1929, making him 95 while Helen, born two years later, is 93. The couple still lives at their home in Newton Township, just a few miles from either of their childhood homes. Though another piece of forgotten history, they figure they must have met at church, when the Apostolic Lutheran Church was still out in the countryside of Otto Township.

“We were very young. Our parents used to visit back and forth,” said Helen. “In those days people visited. Martin lived on that old Mursu place in the middle of the section out there. We’d go visit and they’d come visit us. I suppose we were probably not even teens.”

“I think we met mostly through church,” she continued. “When we went to church, we’d sit in the balcony, that’s where the young people sat. I suppose the reason we were up there is because we didn’t have to sit by our parents.”

Martin said that winters were bad when he was a child and the roads weren’t built up as they are now, so making it to church each week was not as easy it is today. Winters made it more difficult for travel and families often stayed home on cold, blustery winters mornings.

“We went to church when it was in the country,” said Helen.

“It didn’t get moved until the fall of 1945,” agreed Martin.

Though the couple doesn’t remember exactly what their thoughts on one another was in those months and years leading up to marriage, but they know there was a connection to be considered.

“I don’t know,” laughed Helen. “I thought he was alright, you know.”

Since then, the couple said their 75 years have been greatly blessed. They began farming after they were married and built up the family farm, now owned and operated by their son, Tom and his family. While the robotic dairy is renowned as a local gem, it certainly took effort to get it there.

“When we started farming we didn’t actually have nothing, did we?” asked Helen.

“Not much, no,” agreed Martin.

“When we heard that we were going to be able to rent a farm, he had bought a brand new Minneapolis Moline tractor,” said Helen. “Of course, we had payments on it, but we didn’t have any other machinery. We had a 1949 Ford Club Coupe, so after we did buy a few cattle, that’s what we hauled milk to town, in the back of that thing.”

Just as their dairy farm began with little and grew to its impressive size, their marriage was no different. Their comfort and ease with each other has grown over the years and not without a similar amount of effort and communication.

“It takes a lot of cooperation and a lot of forgiveness,” said Helen. “We haven’t always agreed, but there’s always been forgiveness. Especially when you’re on the farm with a lot of work and you’re trying to get stuff done and take care of your children. I think it’s been a good deal, don’t you think so?”

“I think so,” said Martin. “It’s been blessed in more ways than one.”

They agreed that seeing their children and their children visit is usually the highlight of their week. With six children, 20 grandchildren and 40 great grandchildren, they have plenty of faces to visit with on a weekly basis. There, they model a, perhaps imperfect, but successful and longstanding marriage with 75 years of effort behind it.

“I would advise them to have God as their unhidden guest in their home and that they aren’t always going to think alike,” said Helen. “There’s a lot of work in being married, especially at first I think. You think you know each other, but you don’t really know each other that well I don’t think.”

“I agree,” said Martin. “I think that God should be involved in our marriage.”

With so many blessings, the couple was also the celebrated guests at a 75th anniversary party thrown by their children on March 22 at the Apostolic Lutheran Church. Hundreds of family members and friends from as far as Duluth, Arizona, South Carolina and the state of Washington came to celebrate their legacy.

“It was a very good turnout,” said Martin. “There were more people than I expected.”

“Yeah, it was a great thing,” agreed Helen. “The kids went to quite a bit of work to put it up, we had a great turnout. They said that fellowship was so packed, not everyone could sit down.”

“I would have never dreamt of it,” said Helen of reaching 75 years. “There’s always tragedies and stuff, I would have never thought that.”

“That’s another one of numerous gifts,” said Martin.

“Yes,” said Helen, “We really believe that God has blessed us in more ways than one.”

“Oh, yeah,” agreed Martin. “No question.”